K-VON's Modern Life

alexscordelis:

So last week in a post I wrote about Moneyball, I mentioned Angels in the Outfield, a movie I hadn’t thought about in a long time, and thinking about it reminded me of a run-in I once had with Danny Glover.

About 10 years ago, me and my buddy Kayvon went to a San Francisco Giants game at Pac Bell Park (now AT&T Park). We had fantastic seats just a couple of rows back from the visitors dugout. During the starting lineup announcements, Kayvon spotted none other than Danny Glover — Mr. Henry Sherman himself! — sitting three rows behind us (He’s a San Francisco native and a huge Giants fan). I was completely starstruck. Can you blame me? He’s the star of Predator 2, one of my all-time favorite movies (No joke, that movie rules). Now I don’t remember if it was Kayvon or me, but one of us had the bright idea to shout out some of Danny Glover’s iconic lines during lulls in the game. So whenever the catcher went to the mound or the side was retired, Kayvon and I would say things like “I’m getting too old for this shit!” (Lethal Weapon) or “Till now it’s been all fun and games! Cops and robbers! Dunkin’ Donuts!” (Predator 2) or “I believe in angels!” (Angels in the Outfield) 

I thought Danny Glover would be amused by our antics, but during the 5th inning, I glanced over my shoulder to gauge his reaction and I learned two hard lessons very quickly: 1) Danny Glover does NOT like it when you quote his own movies to him during a baseball game, and 2) nothing will send a chill through your bones like looking over your shoulder and seeing Danny Glover — a mere 10 feet away — glaring at you with fury in his eyes. 

I jabbed Kayvon in the ribs and told him to cut it out, but he couldn’t help himself and yelled, “I’m gettin’ too old for this shit!” one last time. At the top of the next inning, Danny Glover stood up, looked at us, shook his head in disapproval, and left our section. He didn’t return for the rest of the game. 

To this day, if I ever stumble upon a Danny Glover movie while channel surfing, I feel a pang of guilt about that afternoon in San Francisco. On a completely separate note, Moneyball is excellent and you should go see it. 

I’m not a trouble starter! I swear!